TFT and EMDR:
Healing Past Hurts
My first experience with these new therapies dealt with my issues concerning my parent’s divorce. Steve Reed asked me what I noticed when I thought of the divorce and one memory always came to mind. It was a memory of me sitting on the stairs in our new house, when I was 12 years old, feeling very sad. This was because me, two of my sisters and my mom had moved away form the rest of the family. Steve had me concentrate on how that made me feel physically. I could feel a dull pain in my lower chest and sometimes in my stomach. Steve Reed then walked me through what it was that I was upset about and had me rank each thing on a scale from 0 to 10. Ten represented the worst. These things came to mind:
We then began the treatment with the worst of the feelings: missing my father, sister and brother. He asked me what I thought about when I felt this pain. I said that I could see my father’s face. As I concentrated on that image and the pain, Steve walked me through the therapy. The treatment involved various eye movement patterns and my tapping on certain acupressure points while I remained focused on the parts of the issue that bothered me. At the time, I thought this was completely weird–what was this guy doing? But I was soon to become a believer.
After the therapy was finished, Steve asked me how I felt about the pain now? I then realized that the pain was virtually gone. I can remember letting out a very deep sigh–almost like a weight had been lifted off my chest.
We worked on an issue about missing my friends and my hometown and then that pain was also gone. We repeated the therapies on two other painful issues and they quickly went to a pain ranking of between 0 and 1.
One upsetting issue (not liking the new school) was linked to the memory of mom driving us to school every morning. During the trip, we would hear the same radio ad for a western wear store. I can still hear the music. Steve treated me for this as well and then there was no more pain. Again, another heavy sigh.
As I left his office, I was happy–really happy. So happy that I can remember singing in the car on the way back to my office. In the week to come I would sigh heavily quite often–almost like my mind would look for the pain, and when it couldn’t be found, would physically let me know about it with a sigh. I also felt a very deep calm.
Steve Reed said to pay special attention over the next few days to see what else I thought of–especially if it was troubling. What came to mind was the picture of the last time I saw my first true love, when I was 26. We had driven to a spot overlooking the city where we just held each other until we finally had to go. That was the last time I saw her and the last time I talked to her. The therapy went much the same for this issue. Steve walked me through the parts that were painful and with each, the pain went away. In this case, it was replaced with good feelings. Instead of feeling sad about this girl leaving me, I now feel happy that I knew and fell in love with such a great person.
Darren S., Dallas, Texas